"Like the sun’s rays that cause the seed to stir within its husk, love’s radiant energy penetrates the façade of the false self, calling forth resources hidden deep within us. Its warmth wakes up the life inside us, making us want to uncurl, to give birth, to grow and reach for the light. It calls on us to break out of our shell, the personality-husk surrounding the seed potential of all that we could be."-John Welwood
Couples Therapy can be a supportive container for intimate partners who would like to engage in relationship in a conscious and healthy way.
Intimate relationships serve as a path of profound growth and awakening as well as a powerful mirror for our shadows. There are few experiences in life more ecstatic than falling in love or more painful than heartbreak. Couples who choose long-term relationship will often experience many cycles of both falling in love and the pain of disconnection.
I work with couples who value and desire deep, passionate relationships, but struggle with fear of vulnerability, intimacy, or full self expression. Past pain, heartbreak, and trauma can lead to fear of being close with others or fear of being alone. Healthy relationships include both intimacy and autonomy. I believe that it is our deep intimacy with ourselves that allows us to make the leap to open to another and simultaneously, a loving partnership can offer the support and catalyst for the deep inner work of an individual. I support couples in connecting with their own heart's longings and sharing with each other from that place. I help couples learn to give each other loving support while maintaining their individuality, to discover and express their unique balance of autonomy and intimacy.
My work is grounded in Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy which is an empirically validated and well researched approach that helps couples go underneath the layers of reactivity and share vulnerable emotions and needs with each other in a safe way.
Many couples today are navigating brand new territory in the forms of relationship they choose and redefining what it means to be a couple or a family. Many couples are seeking to explore relationship as a path of spiritual and personal growth, to use the mirror of relationship to understand themselves more deeply, while simultaneously making up the tools and structures for this as they go.
I have experience supporting couples in diverse expressions of relationship including polyamorous and queer couples and have a special love of supporting queer couples on the path of marriage and parenting.
Couples Therapy can be short-term and focused on cultivating relationship skills or navigating a transition or longer-term to explore deeper goals and blocks to intimacy.
Couples Therapy can be helpful at several key moments in a relationship:
For a new relationship to create a healthy foundation
When a relationship begins to deepen and old wounds or blocks are triggered by the new love
When preparing for living together, marriage, or starting a family
When one or both partners experience life stress that impacts the relationship
After a crisis has occurred in the relationship that might challenge the couple staying together
When ending a relationship, therapy can help the couple move forward in a more loving and clear way that can create a healthier foundation for future relationships